Weight Lost, Hope Gained…by Emily

Sharing the Hope found after WLS!

CONstructive vs. DEstructive November 18, 2010

Filed under: Motivation — Weight Lost Hope Gained @ 10:32 PM

As I logged on to Facebook this morning I saw this posted as the Status update for Bariatric Eating: “When you look in the mirror what do you see first – the weight you have lost, or the distance you have left to travel?” I will post my response in a little while. I was one of the first to respond but have checked back through out the day to see people responses and some of them prompted my heart to become heavy for some of those in the WLS community.

I know that we as obese people have had and still have problems with depression, low self-esteem, and self- worth because the disease literally sucks the life and all of our being out of us so these self images are all we have known BUT there is HOPE in life after WLS and we need to find that and find it quick so we can get on living the lives we have been given. Here is my response to the question: “Weight Lost. Distance left to travel DOES NOT define me! Plus, when are we *done* traveling? I am not just talking about weight I’m also talking about what’s on the inside of us as well, when we look in the mirror we should see so much more than outward appearance and always strive towards—going the distance—this is a way of life and we are constantly in the race, there is no finish line! Happy Thursday everybody!”

I am not saying I believe in myself and my self-worth 100% or I wouldn’t have this blog although some days are better than others, the good days tend to come around more often lately….I could get used to this ;-). I am not saying that my life is AMAZING everyday because I am still human and stumble. BUT what I am saying is that when we start believing in the *why* we had surgery—not just because of our physical health issues but our mental health as well—then we will find that others believe OUR *why* as well. In other words when we believe in ourselves THAT is when others will believe in us and I don’t know about you but I want my family and YOU all to believe in me…I mean come on, you all are an extremely important part of my life!…not to mention the happiness and joy we find in ourselves. I have to say that I have learned and am still learning so much about myself that I would have never known with having this surgery.

So friends lets start being more CONstructive in our criticism of ourselves. Let’s stand in front of our mirror’s and others and be proud of all that we have accomplished and learned on our journey’s no matter how long or short they are. If you are having a bad day and find you are beating yourself up, each negative thing you say or think of yourself needs to be coupled with a positive thing. I do this and when I have to stop and think of something positive that I had hidden by all the negative I’m like WOW!…OK!….I’m liking this….and come on we all know that positive thoughts make us happy and encourage us, it is then that we will start believing in our *why’s*.

So, let’s really focus on telling the DEstructive self to hit the road, we don’t have time to entertain those thoughts because they just are not worthy of our time–plain and simple. They are selfish and debilitating to our spirits and have no business clouding our judgement. Please be proud of yourself and your journey, you have accomplished so much just in having surgery! Please remember that your story is YOUR story, NOT anyone elses. It is so detrimental to our spirits when we try to compare ourselves to one another (and yes I have been guilty of doing just that) and compare successes. Success is SUCCESS no matter how big or small and we need to embrace it all the same!

Ok my friends let’s work on kickin’ DEstructive criticism to the curb, and start cuddlin up with some CONstructive criticism for our own overall well-being! 😉

Finish Well,



2 Responses to “CONstructive vs. DEstructive”

  1. Rhonda Says:

    So true, Emily! Very nice blog! It’s as if you’ve been doing this for awhile!

    I’ve been struggling with really “seeing” what I’ve accomplished. Just talked with a friend yesterday about fighting the urge to be “scope-locked” on how far I still have to go.

    I went home and put my “before” pants on! What a shot in the arm!

    XOXOOX — You’re doing great! (and so am I!)


  2. Rhonda! I am so happy to hear you say that you are doing great BECAUSE YOU ARE!!! Looking at the WHOLE picture is sometimes the hardest but good for you for showing yourself just how far you have come by putting on those before pants, it really puts it all into perspective doesn’t it?! Yay you!! Love ya!!

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